I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I work with guys wanting to get free of enslavement to pornography with Setting Captives Free. One of the constant refrains I hear from the guys that I work with is that getting free of porn is difficult, disappointing, and above all…lonely. I remember this struggle well. You come to church, hurting. You hate yourself. You’re disappointed. And you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that all the friendly, well-put-together people that you’re worshiping with would cry “LEPER, UNCLEAN!” were you to let slip your deep, dark struggles. Brothers and sisters, why is this?
I remarked to one of my students recently that I have noticed a trend that is seriously problematic. Akin to the user group mentality in the tech world, we get together to nerd out over a common interest. If the music, lighting, fog machine, and the stars align, maybe we can feel a little bit of kinship with the folks with whom we are attending this week’s Jesus User Group meeting.
We go there, hoping to keep our social statuses up. We have a need to be seen as spiritual…as holier than we are. In large part this is because so much preaching today is “how to be a better person”, and not “why you desperately need the gospel.” Thus, the Church (capital C) is seen as a group of well-meaning, mostly-together people who really just want to add a little Jesus to their lives. Here’s the thing…
The problem with that whole tendency is…it’s a bald faced, and destructive lie.
(15) And as he reclined at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners were reclining with Jesus and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. (16) And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that he was eating with sinners and tax collectors, said to his disciples, “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?” (17) And when Jesus heard it, he said to them, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.
Mark 2:15-17 (ESV)
So if you are called, you are a sinner in desperate need of the remedy for your sickness. That sickness is sin, and the remedy is the gospel. That’s all of us. It’s not all of us before we “get saved”…it’s all of us, all the time. The Church is not a social club, it’s a HOSPITAL.
Ok, so the Church is a hospital. What does that mean? How are we to tend to the sick?
(1) Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. (2) Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
Galatians 6:1-2 (ESV)
Look closely at those instructions. We have there two commands.
1. Those of you who are spiritual (note this does not mean perfect…it means the opposite of fleshly…or carnal. Paul talks elsewhere about the carnal mind. This is those who have a spiritual mind. Those who belong to Christ and are in the Church…not necessarily the perfect. Remember, if they were perfect, they wouldn’t need Christ.) should restore one caught in a transgression.
2. Bear one another’s burdens.
Now #2 flows out of #1, but BOTH of them presuppose that we know what our brothers and sisters are struggling with. We must KNOW this. How?
(13) Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. (14) Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. (15) And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. (16) Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
James 5:13-16 (ESV)
Look at how beautiful that is. You’re not supposed to be alone. Call for the elders. Pray for one another. Serve one another. Bear one another’s burdens. And this all happens because of what James says there…Confess your sins to one another. You need Christian fellowship, and that doesn’t mean you need to hang around people who have it all together. You need to BE together, praying for one another, weeping for one another. You need to confess your sins to your brothers and sisters so they CAN obey Galatians 6 and CAN bear your burdens.
Why? Why is this so difficult? Lots of potential reasons. More sin, basically. Pride, believing Satan’s lies over God’s promises. But why is it even necessary?
(5) so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.
Romans 12:5 (ESV)
(25) Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.
Ephesians 4:25 (ESV)
Brother or Sister, we’re members of one another. I am a member of you, and you are a member of me, and we are members of one another. The unity of the body of Christ is at stake here, and that’s why Satan has expended so much energy to the end of getting us to come to church while remaining alone!
I highly recommend Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands by Paul Tripp. It’s a good insight into how the Church is supposed to work, but reader, you need the Body.
How do we get there? Well, part of it is to recognize that you’re not alone. When I confessed to my best friend that I’d struggled for porn for 30 years, he was amazed I waited so long. “Did you think you were alone???” He actually asked me that. Yeah…..yeah, I did. That was a lie, and it kept me starved from the grace I needed…the grace that God promised me because I would be in communion with the Body of Christ.
But really, there’s no substitute for open, honest confession. In a prayer meeting…with an appropriate audience (honor parents’ wishes as to how much their kids will be exposed to certain sins), just confess and ask for prayer for yourself. Be honest. Be open. I think you’ll find that others have been waiting for someone to be open with, but regardless, YOU will be obedient to Christ, and there is no greater aspiration.
Don’t live like an orphan. You are not alone. Confess your sins to one another, restore one another in a spirit of gentleness, and bear one another’s burdens.
Theological Wanderings 